Anxiety

Today I had to go see the doctor.

As I was sitting in the waiting room I spied a brochure about anxiety. Naturally being a curious creature, I decided to squint and attempt to read from a distance. Funny that It Didn't Work. So I quickly got up and snatched one up. Whilst ready it, I came across one paragraph which I thought most related to me. Here it said:

"Specific Phobia: When a person has a Specific Phobia, he/she feels very fearful about a particular object or situation. As a result, people may go to great lengths to avoid these objects/situations, making it difficult for them to go about their daily life. Examples include fear of having an injection or travelling on a plane."

Fear Of Having An Injection. Yep, that's me right there. I hate needles. I get nervous and tense around them. Seeing them is awful. Even thinking about it causes me to break out in a sweat. Just writing about it right now, I have clammy palms and the muscles in my shoulder have tensed up. I have to constantly move my hands, usually end up wringing them together.

I looked up the phobia of needles which turned out to be:

Aichmophobia - fear of needles or pointed objects.

Ok back to my point of this post. So before I had read this brochure, I did notice that my anxiety levels were rising. I was agitated and starting to sweat. And while I was sitting there I tried to figure out what was wrong with me. After a moment, I realised that it was because I don't go to the doctor often and that the last few times I'd been there was to get various injections. Unconsciously I think my body was reacting to my location. I started freaking out a little b it and had to take a few moments to calm myself down and remind myself that I wasn't there to get any injections. Because if I were, there's no chance that I'd be alone.

Last time I had to go there was for a flu shot, to which I dragged The Boyfriend along. I know he's spoken to his mother about my fear and she believes that it's something that might be put on. Not that I don't necessarily have a legitimate fear, but because I'm usually with someone I put it on more to gain sympathy.

Yeah I agree, sometimes I could possibly be like that. But there are a lot of cases where I've been alone and have had the exact same reaction. Unfortunately I believe I do have a phobia.

It's been hard writing up this post, but good to talk about it as well. After reading the brochure, I realise it does rule my life to an extent. I avoid having to see or hear about it, and try to get out of as many injections as possibly.

And now I'm off to try stop the anxious feeling that's started up